Tag Archive for: me time

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/in /by

Failing the
DHG Challenge, or Did I? by Debra H. Goldstein

I’m
disappointed. I failed the DHG Challenge.

In my October
11, 2019 blog post, I wrote: “I’m
making a conscious decision to stop and announce, “Not me, anymore.” I’m going
to go back to making time for myself – whether exercising, reading, or hanging out
on the couch, I’m taking back a few hours for myself. Will you join me?”

Later in the blog, I asked
people to comment or write what they planned to do and how they were doing on
the challenge. Initially, the response was positive. Most people were going to
make more time for reading. One said exercise and a few can best be described
as making time to veg. Did they succeed? I don’t know because very few wrote again
after their first or second responses. What I do know is how I succeeded.

I failed in that I only exercised twice, read four books and
didn’t hang out that much on my couch

(maybe I did succeed at that one when I
was home). What I did do was more PR than I want to think about for Two Bites
Too Many during its launch weeks; visited my sister, nieces, and new grandniece
in California when I added a few days to attending the Kensington cozy cons in
Redondo Beach and San Diego; hosted the entire family for the weekend when we
blessed my newest grandchild in temple; spent a week in Dallas at Bouchercon; sadly
said good-bye to a younger friend who died unexpectedly; held other friends
close having been reminded of how valuable my friend “sisters” are; and joined
friends at the Biltmore estate to see what the house looked like lit for
Christmas (a bucket list item). All in all, I was a very busy lady.

And you know what, I may have failed some aspects of the DHG
Challenge, but I lived every moment of the past two months and realized the
importance of sometimes sacrificing “me time.” I also understood that there
were times I needed to make for myself – and I did. That balance for me is the
key to mental and physical health.

So, maybe I did pass the DHG Challenge.

Me time???

/in /by

by: Joelle Charbonneau

While talking to a friend the other day, I was asked the question, “When do you have time for you?”

Time for me?

The question stopped me dead in my tracks. Perhaps it shouldn’t have. But it did. Which probably isn’t good. Most days, I’m so busy taking care of my son, making sure the house doesn’t dissolve into complete disarray (notice I didn’t say keeping it pristine), teaching voice lessons, getting dinner ready for my family, spending time with my husband and somewhere in the middle of all of that getting writing done. Who has time to take time for hair cuts or movies or anything else that might be considered “me time”?

Now that I think about it, I realize that the time I’ve always considered “me time” is actually writing time. For years, writing felt like a hobby. I sat down and wrote stories. No one was paying for them. Heck, aside from my family and a few brave agents no one read those stories. Was it work to create them? Yes. But the lack of income made me rationalize that the time spent on those stories was time spent on me. It made me feel less guilty when I was writing instead of cleaning toilets or scrubbing the floor. Good plan, right?

Then. Yes. Now…not so much.

Almost three years ago, I transitioned from writing as a hobby to writing as a job. But I never transitioned from thinking about my writing as time spent on me to time spent on my work. And that’s a problem. I mean, we all need time to recharge our batteries. Right? We need to get a haircut (which I only remember to do one or two times a year) and a manicure (which I’ve only done once because my mother insisted I had to) or a massage (which some day I plan on doing). No matter what job you are doing, and how much you define yourself by that job—you need time away from it in order to be the happiest, healthiest person you can be.

Of course, now that I’ve worked that out, I have no idea how to set aside time to spend on me. This is where you come in. I need help. Lots and lots of help in figuring out how to make this happen. How do you do it? How do you spend time with family, do your work, make sure the house doesn’t disintegrate into chaos and still carve out moments to do something you enjoy just for you? Trust me when I say, I will be waiting anxiously for your thoughts!