Survival of the Smartest

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Last October, I attended the Novelists Inc one day conference in St. Petersburg. It was a panel style workshop comprised of industry professionals and the topic was the future of publishing. I’m happy to report that yes, publishing does have a future. It’s just a different future than some of us might have envisioned ten years ago. E-books are here to stay and they will take over print books. Like it or not, it’s a reality. Twenty years ago the only people who had cell phones were doctors and drug dealers. Now, even ten year olds have them. Technology is growing at an exponential rate and E-readers were one of the hottest selling items last holiday season. People are not going to stop reading. They are just going to use a different medium and we, as writers, have to adapt to that medium or see our futures in publishing go the way of those big old fashioned stationary rotary dial phones (remember them?) Yeah, there’s a whole generation out there who have no idea what I’m talking about.

This past week I’ve been following the Amanda Hocking story. If you don’t know who she is, don’t feel bad. I didn’t either until she started making publishing headlines. Although apparently, plenty of other people did know who she was. She’s the chick who self-published her novels, selling them on Amazon, and Barnes and Noble, and has made 7 figures since putting up her first book last year. Yes, you read that correctly. According to this NY Times article she’s made almost 2 million dollars. The interesting thing is that she made news recently because despite all her mega success in the world of self-publishing she’s just signed a huge deal ($2 million) with St. Martins Press for 4 YA novels, the first scheduled to debut next year. You can read about the deal right here.

In an interesting twist, Barry Eisler, a best selling author of traditional published books, has turned down an offer from the same publisher (St. Martins Press) to self-publish. He thinks he’ll end up making more money in the long run, by going it alone. I have to say, he makes sense. You can read his reasoning right here on Book Beast.

This all takes me back to last October, sitting in that big conference room listening to the panel talk (one of the panelists, by the way, was self-pub guru Joe Konrath) about the future of publishing. I think after the events of the past couple of weeks, I can say that almost anything can and will happen. We have to adapt. We have to write smarter and be smarter businesswomen. Our books are our merchandise and we have to get our merchandise in front of people to read. Any way we can.

Maria

When Technology Goes Bad

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I was going to write about my building excitement for the royal wedding, but will save that for next week. Today, instead, I write about the horrors of technology and wonder how you, Stiletto faithful, deal with dead laptops, frozen flash drives, and assorted other problems that befall the innocent in this technology-enabled world.

It all started last week when my trusty PC, the one that I’ve been working on for over six years, turned itself off and wouldn’t turn back on.  It was as if it was saying “go on without me; I’m just so very tired,” while I was screaming, “Don’t you die on me, PC!”  (Did I mention that I don’t back up my documents as a general rule?)  I walked past it several times during the day, disconsolately pushing the “on” button to see if it would come back, even just for one day so I could gather some of the work I had been doing.  No chance.

I did what anyone would do and called my friend, Susan, the baker, to lament my problem.

“No problem!” she said cheerfully.  “My cousin is a tech wizard!”

And indeed he was.  I brought him the laptop, he recovered everything and also installed all sorts of new bells and whistles so that the thing runs like a top.  And there was joy across the land.

While I was waiting for the PC to return, I decided to buy a Mac, having had my fill of computer-killing viruses.  I had heard wonderful things about Macs and decided that the time was nigh. I bought a fun, little 13″ laptop (the 17″ was $600 more and I didn’t want to spend the extra money).  While I was waiting for the new modem so that I could install the wireless internet capabilities on the Mac, I used the kids’ computer, otherwise known as “Old Faithful.”  Old Faithful has served us well, now being into its second decade.  Sure, it’s slow, but it’s dependable.  I’m working on a new book and made some headway, not having the distraction of the internet to help me veer off course.  I had made great headway, and had twenty pages written…some of them even good.  Today, after catching up on work, I plugged in the flash drive, the new book being the only thing that I had backed up, hoping to write another five or so pages.

The flash drive was dead.  It won’t load, it won’t open, and none of the documents seem to be on there anymore.

I went through several stages of grief, but thankfully, never broke down as completely as I wanted to.  It’s just twenty pages, right?  They might not be any good, yes?  It may be the writing gods’ way of telling me to start again.

I’m not buying any of it.  The flash drive is now in the capable hands of Susan the baker’s cousin who hopefully, will work his magic.

In the meantime, if you hear the rantings of a mad woman in your neck of the woods, it is just I wondering why we need all of this stuff in the first place when paper and pen served us just fine for centuries.

Horror stories, please.  They will make me feel better.  And the ones with happy endings will really make my day.

Maggie Barbieri

Goodie, goodie, the mind candy TV is back!

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By the end of the day, in fact once I’ve cooked and eaten dinner, I’m not good for much of anything except relaxing in front of the TV.

I’m delighted my reality shows are back especially Dancing with the Stars. My daughter-in-law always comes to watch with us, and hubby is much better at seeing the missteps than either of us. We’re always enthralled with the great costumes. It’s also fun to watch the chubby ones shed the pounds.It doesn’t take us long to choose our favorites either. I’m rooting for Kristi Alley.

That’s not the only one I watch, Amazing Race is well…amazing. I can’t believe what those people have to do. They’d all do better if they took the time to read the directions through before dashing off through the foreign city they’ve found themselves in. I have a granddaughter and her husband who are determined to do the Amazing Race. She’s a speech therapist in a public school, her hubby a deputy sheriff. They have two young kids. They are grooming the grandparents (my daughter and son-in-law) to be ready to take over if and when they get to go.

Oh, and there’s also Survivor. Now this one I can’t watch when it’s on because I have my writers’ group to go to on Wendnesday nights, but I can watch it on my computer the next day.

I try to watch Celebrity Apprentice (can’t believe how rude and obnoxious all those so-called celebs are) but I usually fall asleep before it’s over.

My sister (she’s old like me but tapes everything and watches the next day) and my eldest daughter are also addicted–and I can count on them to tell me the outcome in case I don’t stay awake until the end of any of these shows.

My excuse? Where else can you observe such interesting characters?

Marilyn
http://fictionforyou.com/

Moink and Ooo

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Being a Grandma is absolutely delightful and positively exhausting.

A couple of days ago, I babysat from 4 to 7:30. When I arrived, my son announced that Ms. Riley, age 9 months, hadn’t had an afternoon nap (and only a 30 minute one in the car in the morning). Even Riley, the perfect child, is not so perfect at that time.

I decide to take her for a walk in the stroller – she likes it and she usually falls asleep – except when she doesn’t because she likes to look around. It was a beautiful day and she enjoyed the neighborhood stroll. To be fair, she finally did sleep, for all of 20 minutes because she woke up within 15 seconds of my stopping and I wasn’t up for another 45 minute walk.

So we came inside and played…and played…and played. I fed her dinner which she thoroughly enjoyed, especially the part where she squished the banana slices in her fingers before struggling to make the transfer from sticky fingers to mouth. Often the dexterity eluded her, which meant banana in the hair (hers and mine) I gave her a bath, again lots of fun, even if Grandma was drenched by the end. But it was clear that she was fading fast.

I didn’t want to put her to sleep because if she went to bed before a final nursing with her Mom, she’d wake up in an hour, refreshed from her nap just about the time the adults in the house were ready to call it a night. So I just had to hang on for another 30 minutes and the cavalry, e.g. her mom, would be arriving.

At this point, her only comfort was me holding her (all 20 pounds of that cute bundle), swaying back and forth (while ignoring growing lower back pain), and most of all, singing her favorite song. Now this little ditty was written by my daughter-in-law, as an accompaniment to a rather oddly designed stuffed animal that Riley adores. It is affectionately called Pig Cow, which is in fact what it looks like. The song is as follows:

I’m a little pig cow, pig cow, pig cow
I’m a little pig cow, pig cow, pig
Pigs say oink
Cows say moo
I say Moink
And sometimes Ooo.

I was up to about my 2,000th rendition of the song, when it struck me that, with just a little minor variation, it’s exactly the same tune as the childhood classic, “I’m a Little Teapot, Short and Stout, Here is my handle, Here is my spout.”

I decide to change it up, and launched, with much bravado, into a full-out rendition of this new ditty.

The Queen was not amused.

She looked at me like I had belched, loudly, at Buckingham Palace.

Her face screwed up, her tears were big and plentiful.

I apologized profusely and immediately switched back to the Pig Cow tune (which I’m humming now even in my sleep).

Temporary peace was restored, although it was clear that trust had been breached.

What could I do to restore the sunny disposition of this wondrous child? I still had ten minutes to kill. It was time for the last resort.

Have you ever heard of Mum-Mums? I have raised four children and until a month ago, had never heard of this delicacy, each box of which costs about the same as a new car. They are rice rusks, organic of course, with a touch of sugar, and the equivalent of Godiva chocolate in the baby world.

Interrupting the Pig Cow song long enough to explain to Ms. Riley what I was about to do, I said, “Riley, honey, there may be sugar in these Mum-Mums, but don’t worry. Your Mommy and Daddy will buy you braces when you are a teenager. Grandma is going to get you a Mum-Mum right now.”

All tears, even hints of tears, stopped. Did I mention that the child’s only vocabulary right now consists of Mum-Mum and Hi? Clearly I was on the right track.

Peace reigned. We sat on the steps, child contentedly eating her treat, me continuing to murmur Moinks and Oooos.

Mom arrived. Grandma gave big kisses and headed for home, exhausted but triumphant.

Would all the problems in the world be so easily fixed with a little Moink, Oooo, and Mum-Mum.

Grandma, aka Marian the Northern half of Evelyn David

Brianna Sullivan Mysteries – e-book series
I Try Not to Drive Past Cemeteries- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
The Dog Days of Summer in Lottawatah- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
The Holiday Spirit(s) of Lottawatah- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
Undying Love in Lottawatah- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
A Haunting in Lottawatah – Kindle – Nook – Smashwords

The Sullivan Investigation Series
Murder Drops the Ball (Spring 2011)
Murder Takes the Cake- Paperback – Kindle
Murder Off the Books- Paperback – Kindle
Riley Come Home (short story)- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords

Romances
Love Lessons – Kindle – Nook – Smashwords

Why My First Draft is Like a Poorly Planned Paint Job

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by Rachel Brady

Interesting development here.

I was making decent progress on my new manuscript until I shared the first half of a first draft with my editors.

Quick question–have any of the writers here ever shared early pages with an editor and been told, “I love it! Keep going!” right off the bat? That has never happened to me. I get that it’s not realistic. (If this actually has happened to you, please consider my question rhetorical and we can remain friends.) Still, a little bitty part of me always hopes . . .

But no. Probably the most acute form of momentum-stopping buzzkill comes when I hear (and agree) that there are major issues with my project.

Here’s why.

It takes me a really long time to write a book. I jump over external obstacles (full time job, three children, fill in the usual excuses here) and internal obstacles (motivation, self-doubt, high propensity to procrastinate) to get those words down. Understanding that many will be re-worked, several times, feels like I imagine it would feel to cross a marathon’s finish line and hear an official say, “We’re sorry. No one saw you run the first ten miles of the course. We’re gonna need you to run those ten again.”

Recently, I used the analogy of painting a large room. You prime one wall and then paint it. The color is all wrong. Now there is a decision point.

Re-prime and repaint that wall and make sure you like the new color before going on? That’s a lot of work. Or go on and prime the other three walls and then re-prime the one you just screwed up? If you do that, the whole time you work you must suffer in the knowledge that the first wall is still there, all wrong, waiting for you to make your way back around.

It kind of mocks you.

It’s a weak analogy. Who primes just one wall? Normally we’d do the whole room, then go back and add the color.

So why is it so dang hard to finish a first draft after realizing that what I have so far will need to be re-worked? If I think too long about all the work I’ll re-do, it is paralyzing. So nothing gets fixed in the draft. And nothing new gets added either.

Ultimately, I decided to prime the whole room. Now I have to walk past those early pages every time I come around with my paintbrush.

Moving on in a story without fixing its base is hard. I pretend that the early stuff is already fixed and that all is fine. All the while, I know that when I finally type THE END, it won’t be. I still have a wall to go back and repaint.

And that’s just to get a first draft!

All the “You missed a spot” and “You dripped over here” and “Don’t forget the trim” and “Really? Cornflower blue?” remarks from the editors are still months away.

It would be so much easier to hire a good looking handyman for this job.

When you guys read this on Friday, I’ll be away at Left Coast Crime and probably unable to chime in on any discussion that follows. But I will be with you in spirit, and so will this handyman.

My Favorite Sports Movies

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I’m not a big basketball fan, but I have to admit that I’ve succumbed to March Madness. Partly because I can’t escape all the basketball going on in my living room as my husband enjoys our brand new 47 inch LCD tv (yes, up until just a few weeks ago, we still had the old box tv) but mostly because my beloved alma mater, the FSU Seminoles have gotten to the sweet 16 (Go Noles!)

It’s been thrilling to watch every dramatic, suspenseful, nail biting second of the games and as I sat down to write the other night I thought about how movies that revolve around sports make such great stories.

And that led me to think of some of my favorite sports movies and what I loved most about them. So I picked one favorite movie from each sport:

Basketball: Hoosiers. This one was a no brainer for me. The absolute best basketball movie of all time for me is Hoosiers. Set in the 1950s in small town Indiana starring Gene Hackman, Dennis Hooper and Barbara Hershey. It’s got heart, soul and romance. I get teary eyed every time I see it.

Football: The Replacements. This is about a bunch of ex-players and semi-losers who fill in for the real players during a pro football players strike. Coincidentally, it also stars Gene Hackman, along with Keanu Reeves. It’s got heart, soul, laughs, and romance.

Hockey: Mystery, Alaska. If you’ve never seen this movie, then run out and rent it. I fell in love with Russell Crowe while watching this! It also stars Burt Reynolds. This film has heart, laughs, and romance (did I already say I fell in love with Russell Crowe in this film?)

Baseball: Bull Durham. This is probably the sexiest sports movie you’ll ever watch. And the funniest. I’m a huge Bull Durham fan (as a matter of fact my first novel- Bunco Babes Tell All- has a Bull Durham subplot to it). It stars Kevin Costner and Susan Sarandon and has probably the best lines of almost any sports movie ever.


So what about you? What are some of your favorite sports movies?

Beauty is in the Eye of…Photoshop?

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If you pick up the April issue of Good Housekeeping—the one with Dr. Oz on the cover—and turn to page 59, you’ll find a full-page photo of yours truly.

Or will you?

My 11-year-old’s first reaction? “Mom, this doesn’t look anything like you.”

I beg to differ. It looks exactly like me. Only better.

Let’s backtrack. A few months ago, I was contacted by Good Housekeeping to be interviewed about a powerful, and effective, new cancer drug. It was an immunotherapy and the one that I had taken. It was the one that saved my life, because having been diagnosed with Stage IV melanoma in 2006, my chances for survival were slim to none. I entered a clinical trial for a drug called tremelimumab (say that three times fast) and had an immediate, positive response to it. My tumors, which numbered in the hundreds, began to shrink and fade (many were bluish and on my skin) and were eventually eradicated. It was nothing short of a miracle.

The cousin of this drug, ipilimumab, will be approved by the FDA for use in metastatic melanoma patients this Friday and believe me, this is an occasion for celebration. Now, there is hope for people who once had little hope for survival.

But back to the photo. After I was interviewed and the story was edited, I was asked for some photos of me and the family. Trouble is, we don’t have too many photos, so the Barbieri family started photographing each other, with limited success. Here is an example of one of the photos we took and submitted to GH.


After sending the editor at the magazine a bunch of photos, she called and said that they would be sending a photographer to me to take a photo. Little did I know what that entailed.

The photographer was a wonderful guy named Rob Howard who couldn’t be nicer or more respected and well-known in the photography world. He was accompanied by his lovely wife, Lisa, a professional hair and makeup stylist named Birgitte, and the shoot stylist from Good Housekeeping, Bill. Of course, because they were coming from a housekeeping magazine, I vacuumed, dusted, and had my friend, Susan (from the wonderful Baked by Susan—“like” it on FB!) make scones. They were duly impressed.

Until they moved my couch.

As I sat getting my hair and makeup done by Birgitte, I heard Rob, who has photographed kings and OPRAH (!) ask, “Does Maggie have a vacuum?” At his uttering of those words, my hair, formerly poufed and teased, fell just a little bit. Why, oh why, Rob Howard, did you have to move the one piece of furniture that I haven’t vacuumed behind since the Clinton administration?

Once the house really was clean, thanks to Rob and his team, it was time for my photos. Three hours and about two hundred photos later, they had their shot. And here is it.


Yes, I am a little airbrushed, and no, my teeth aren’t that white, but I think it’s a pretty good representation of my overall look. The one thing that makes me very happy is that it is a photo of my laughing, which really reflects my overall outlook on life and the spirit of this article. I was nervous that my joy at overcoming a diagnosis like Stage IV melanoma wouldn’t be adequately expressed, but it is. And this photo really illustrates the happiness I feel every day that I am still here to discuss something that at one point, had a very questionable outcome.

I hope you’ll pick up this month’s issue of Good Housekeeping magazine even if it’s only to see how clean my house is.

Maggie Barbieri

Income Tax, Grrrr!

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I have always done my own income tax, even in the days before there were tax programs that did all the mathematics.

A confession here, I am no good at arithmetic. My adding skills are lousy–even using a calculator. Despite all that I still did my own income tax. I was good at reading and understanding the instructions and often sent for the extra booklets and studied them. When something had to be added up I handed it to my husband, he has all the mathematical skills in our relationship.

I’ve never been audited, though I have received letters questioning me about things which I easily answered and cleared up without a problem.

Years ago when I was in the residential care business, when there was a question about a certain section in the tax law about people who took care of others and were paid, I was the lucky one chosen to go to the main Income Tax office and explain their own law to them. This resulted in my taxes being scrutinized and several phone calls from that office asking me questions about how I did this or that. A bit nerve-wracking, but they came over to our side.

Now for the first time I’m stymied and am going to have to see a professional tax person.

It has to do with a mutual fund we cashed in which lost more money for us than it earned. I have all the paperwork–though it took me forever to figure out exactly what it was–and now I don’t have a clue how to put the information into the tax program I have. I’ve tried, believe me I’ve tried, but I’m not doing something right.

I’m losing sleep over it, so I give up. Why on earth do “they” have to make everything so difficult?

So that’s my rant for this week. Hopefully, when next Tuesday rolls around I’ll have the problem solved.

Now back to your regular scheduled and much lighter programming.

Marilyn
http://fictionforyou.com

The Sidestep

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Here’s a confession from the Northern Half of Evelyn David. It’s important to distinguish who is talking here because as you will learn, there’s a real schism in this partnership.

When I drive, I listen to Sirius Radio, specifically I listen to On Broadway (channel 75) with Seth Rudetsky and Christine Pedi, self-described as “a couple of dueling divas.” Truth is, I want them both to shut up and just play the music. I also listen to 40s on 4 – the era of the big band sound. I’ll flip to some classical music if the Broadway tune is too depressing or atonal. I switch over to AM radio to catch the traffic conditions and news on the hour. Great, thoughtful discussions on topics arcane or newsworthy? Not so much. I have what is best described as middlebrow taste – verging on low brow. And I have no apologies for any of it.

In contrast, the Southern half of this writing combo listens to NPR with a dedication that borders on religious fervor. I could no more tell you the host of All Things Considered than she could hum a few bars from Fiddler on the Roof.

But I’m not here to discuss our drive-time taste.

The truth is I don’t listen to NPR, just like I don’t watch much of what’s on the public TV stations now that my kids have outgrown Mister Rogers (a national treasure, may he rest in peace). But I do believe in public funding of the arts, even when the nation is in the midst of an economic crisis, because art, in all its forms, is as necessary to the life of a democracy as clean air. George Washington in 1788 declared the arts “essential to the prosperity of the state and to the ornament and happiness of human life.” If it’s good enough for George, it should be good enough for Representative Doug Lambon, a three-term Republican from Colorado who introduced a bill that would block all taxpayer dollars that NPR might receive.

Representative Lambon has glommed on to the sting operation organized by conservative activist James O’Keefe. Was the fundraiser for NPR who criticized the Tea Party to a potential donor absolutely wrong to make such a comment? Sure. Was it absolutely wrong of O’Keefe to play gotcha by setting up this undercover sting? You bet.

But I’m even more irritated with Representative Lambon. Because I know he knows that NPR receives only 2 percent of its budget from Federal funds. He knows, as the New York Times editorial points out, that his bill is “unattached to a budget measure, it will never survive the Senate or a presidential veto.” It’s what I call “posturing.” Doesn’t really intend to do anything for the current budget crisis, doesn’t really impact NPR, doesn’t really address any issues, but is designed to put his name in lights, maybe draw some attention and money to his political career. What a waste of time and energy when there are bigger, more important problems facing America and the world.


Do you remember the movie, based on a Broadway show, Best Little Whorehouse in Texas? One of the most delicious scenes is Charles Durning, playing the governor of the state, who sings and dances to The Sidestep, able to take whichever position on an issue makes him popular. It’s a show-stopper and the audience responds because it’s not only clever (and Durning is fantastic), but also because too many of us believe that is what most politicians on both sides of the aisle are doing.

This is a serious time. The crises we face here and abroad are real and scary. Stop wasting time crafting bills that don’t address the real issues. Quit dancing The Sidestep.

(Nice that I could end this little rant with a reference to a show tune.)

Marian (the Northern half of Evelyn David)

Brianna Sullivan Mysteries – e-book series
I Try Not to Drive Past Cemeteries- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
The Dog Days of Summer in Lottawatah- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
The Holiday Spirit(s) of Lottawatah- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
Undying Love in Lottawatah- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords
A Haunting in Lottawatah – Kindle – Nook – Smashwords

The Sullivan Investigation Series
Murder Drops the Ball (Spring 2011)
Murder Takes the Cake- Paperback – Kindle
Murder Off the Books- Paperback – Kindle
Riley Come Home (short story)- Kindle – Nook – Smashwords

Romances
Love Lessons – Kindle – Nook – Smashwords

Winner of BEAUTIFUL DISASTER by Laura Spinella!

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Laura has drawn a name from the list of commenters on her Friday post, and it’s Carol M! Carol, you’ve won a copy of Laura’s debut, Beautiful Disaster. We’ll try to get in touch with you to get your mailing address for her. If you see this first, please email sueauthor@aol.com. Congratulations!